Living in a Man's World?

This phrase, found whilst trying to come up with a suitable quick post for facebook has really stuck with me today.  It's so simple, and yet there is such truth in it.
It's one of those phrases that you look and and go "Well, obviously".  Then you look at it again and have a moment of "Oh!"

The world today spends so much time telling us that, as women, to be valuable we need to be the same as men.  Equality has become the keyword, with equality meaning "the same as."  Any organisation who doesn't treat women exactly the same as men must, obviously, be part of the patriarchy and therefore evil.

On the other side, feminism seems to have become a dirty word.  It seems to mean women who are trying to be exactly the same as men. Women who fight too hard, women who aren't prepared to "know their place," women who are too outspoken.

In a world like this, what's a girl to do?

Me?  I look to the Catholic Church (as you may have been able to guess...)

Now I know that to many people, the Church is a symbol and symptom of the oppressive patriarchy. After all, it won't let women become priests, which obviously must mean that it doesn't value women... right?

Wrong.

So very very wrong.

Whilst I'll happily admit there are many things wrong with the administrative side of the Catholic Church, and women currently are not represented well enough, I don't think it's really any worse than many other organisations.  A lot of the problem comes not from the fact that they are women, but that they are laity.

There are plenty of high powered women in the Vatican - the archaeologist in me was delighted to hear about the appointment of Barbara Jatta as director of the Vatican Museums (and yes, Barbara is a female name). This puts them in a minority amongst major museums where the vast majority have male directors. The Pontifical Council for Culture and Voices of Faith are just a couple of examples of things that the Vatican is doing to ensure women's voices are heard more.

This isn't a new thing either.  Throughout the history of the church, there have been important women.  Most of the ones we know about now are because they've been declared saints, but there will be many more who have been forgotten about. It is worth saying at this point that this also applies to men.  Very few of those who have been declared saints have been lay people, although this seems to be changing more in recent years.

Another good place to look to see what the Church actually thinks of women is the veneration it gives to Mama Mary.

In the Catholic Church, we honour Mary because God honoured her first.  Whilst there is no doubt that women have perhaps not been treated as they should have been during history, this wonderful lady has always been held in extremely high regard.  Quite honestly, what higher honour can womankind be given than that one of their own was chosen to give birth to the redeemer of all mankind?  I love the quote above from Redemptoris Mater, because to me it shows the true regard that the Church holds women in.  What more do I need to say?

There are numerous examples of quotes from throughout the history of the church showing the high esteem women are held in. One of my favourites is from the Venerable Fulton J Sheen:

Whilst obviously a woman's value does not come from how inspiring she can be to men, we also need to remember that this is a part, and an important part, of the feminine beauty.  Throughout the Bible we see instance after instance of women inspiring men to better and greater things (Esther, Ruth, Mary to name just a few).  There are also, of course, plenty of examples of women doing the opposite: Delilah betrays Samson; Salome requests the head of John the Baptist; Eve encourages Adam to try the apple.

My message to all my female friends, no matter your age, race or religion is this.  I want you to remember that you have dignity and value because you are you. Not because of whatever successes you may have had, or because of your abilities.  Not because of the way you look or dress or act. Because you are you.

Don't try and be a man in a man's world. Be a woman, and try and make the world better by being you.  You are all that's needed.

You have been called "for a time such as this" (Esther 4:14)

Are you woman enough to give up makeup?

So this post from Life Teen on 102 things to give up for Lent came up on my newsfeed the other day and it got me thinking.

Now some of the things on the list I don't do anyway (spitting gum onto the pavement?  Disgusting), so obviously can't give up, Others on there I don't feel like I need to give up (I mean Pizza? come on - and I don't eat it much anyway on account of the whole funny diet thing).

One or two of them were things I regularly do anyway.  I regularly give up (most) makeup for lent, restricting myself to concealer, mascara (or for special occasions - although then I make myself have the mentality that it's the same as putting on pretty clothes.  It's to look different to normal, not because I don't like the way I look.

This is something that I think we, as women, particularly in the modern world, struggle with a lot. And I used a huge number of commas in that sentence. My GCSE teacher would not be happy with me... Anyway, yes.  Struggle.  We are told so often that we have to look perfect.  We have to look beautiful and totally put together at all times.  If we're having a bad hair day, or have a breakout, or are larger than a size 8, or have an unusually shaped nose, we're just not good enough.

I went through the whole of my school career hating my hair. People constantly mocked me for it, and it has taken me a long time to come to terms with it.  Even now I tend to have it tied up a lot if I don't feel like it's perfect when it's down - fun side of that though is that I've learnt a lot of new things to do with my hair, so it's getting to the point where I tie my hair up because I like the way it looks. For those of you who know me though, it's worth saying that this has never applied to the colour of my hair.  I like my natural hair colour, I just prefer the various shades of red it's been over the past 7 1/2 years...

It's so easy to look in a mirror and point out your flaws, but that's not how we should be living. My eyes are too small, my nose is too big, my pores are too visible, the shadows under my eyes are too dark. Maybe if I slather my face in makeup these faults will be hidden and people won't notice.

The whole "no-makeup selfie" thing actually made me really sad.  The idea that people are having to be brave to post a photo of themselves without makeup on is just... well, is that really how life should be?

I find that, from time to time, particularly if I've been wearing a lot of makeup regularly, I get to a point where I'm wearing makeup because I don't like the way my face is without it.  The first time I really noticed this was shortly before lent one year, so I figured, since lent is the perfect time to give up things you are overly attached to, it was the perfect thing to give up that year.  I've pretty much repeated the practise every year.

So here's my question.  How attached to your makeup are you? Do you wear makeup because you prefer the way you look with it or because you don't like the way you look without it.  If the answer is a completely honest yes to the first part, then feel free to carry on.  If the latter, then maybe this is an area of your life you should look at.

Maybe this is the year you challenge yourself to be woman enough to give up makeup for lent and learn to love yourself for who you truly are.

Hmm... this post went in a completely different direction to how I originally planned, so I shall just have to do another one soon!